PART II: THE ANALYSIS

I hung up the phone and thought to myself…..Hmmm….Most women will agree that “CHICKS” can almost always get the calendar out and make a clear-cut plan when asked to do something and are likely to confirm hours before meeting. However, if they’re going to be late, most women will usually call or text to let you know they’re going to be tardy. Why though is it that MOST MEN have problems making definite plans? Is it because often some men get scared and may think that if they make, and keep plans they’ll automatically assume the woman is SO into them that she’s thinking about the wedding before even going on a second date? Do men ever take the time to actually think that maybe she’s just looking forward to a fun night with someone she recently met, felt a connection and chemistry with, and just wants to casually see where things may go? After all, finding someone where almost everything fits isn’t always an easy task and no matter at what stage of life you are in, as long as each person has stability, why not test the waters -- do you really have anything to lose? HOWEVER, what’s really horrible is when some men do make plans, and more often than not, they think it’s ok to confirm 30 to 60 minutes before meeting as opposed to confirming before 2pm and being considerate and polite! Men, SMARTEN UP, advanced confirmation is preferred!

Since Chase and I can and did make plans, we met at Starbucks, got a quick tea, and both looked at each other and said, “You up for some shopping and schmeying around?” We both smiled and nodded, hell ya, always up for a trip to Saks!

Chase is in a relationship and contemplating whether or not to pull the trigger and move in with Kevin. I thought to myself, they’ve been dating long enough that if she’s being indecisive about moving in with him there must be some issue. As we were catching up, I was giving her “Jewish guilt” about not being able to do a girl’s night out.

“Ok, spill it, enough of the bull shit. Let the ‘Maven’ hear what’s going on and WHY you can’t do a girl’s night and what’s really holding you back from moving in with Kevin? Why are you being so iffy and indecisive? This isn’t like you!” This unintentionally opened up a can of worms and Chase began to vent.

“Ha! You are funny and VERY perceptive, too. You can always tell when I’m annoyed! Bottom line is, it’s how Kevin goes about making plans, and the fact that he can’t make definite plans is really annoying and bothersome to me. It’s gotten to the point that it’s getting under my skin worse than a frustrating, un-popable blemish!” I laughed!

“What? What do you mean he can’t make plans? But…you said you two had plans tonight.”
“Yes, we do, BUT we spoke briefly on Thursday about Saturday night, and he told me he spoke to his cousins who asked to get together with us but he never ‘set it in stone’ and instead left the plans up in the air. Why he does this, I don’t know. I told him you were coming into town and that Saturday night I wanted to do something with you if we weren’t going to do something with them. But the reason why I couldn’t tell you until today is because yesterday when I told him I was going to do something with you tomorrow night, he freaked and blurted out, “WHAT, we have plans with my cousins.”

“Well, this started a whole argument and boy did we have words! I reiterated the conversation we had THURSDAY morning about the POSIBILITY of doing something with his cousins Saturday night, but he never bothered to let me know that he did in fact make definite plans with them. I scorned him for not confirming the plans with me or checking to see if I was still free. I’m pissed because this is a reoccurring pattern with him. I’m starting to question whether I want to consistently keep being annoyed and frustrated by him. It’s not that I cared if we were doing something; it’s the FACT that he always waits until last minute to tell me he’s made plans. You’ve know me forever; I can make a plan the day before, follow through, or tell anyone in advance giving ample notice that I’m not free. BUT, for some reason, and like the majority of men, HE CAN’T make, confirm, and inform me of any plans he’s made…it’s driving me NUTS! I just don’t know what to do.”

I dropped my head down, rolled my eyes and saw Chase was quite frustrated and disturbed by the lack of communication with her Beau, like any woman would be.